Monday, July 2, 2012
bila kutunggu
alhamdulillah..another year of study had passed by..having internship now for about 2months ++..it is quite boring since most of the time we'll sit and goyang kaki..not much works..dgn perangai org yg mcm x faham malay=__=
But..yes..i'm learning a lot..Kalau selama ni ddk uia rasa selamat dan persekitaran selesa..This is the 2nd time rasa something different..the 1st time was during PLKN..masa ni la dpt tgk masyarakat tu mcm mana..and mmg bile berdepan dgn masy stand kita akn sgt diuji..between nk siapkn kerja and solat..dengan ikhtilatnya..klau kt uia xde org nk tepuk tampar cubit buat muke mntk penampar..skrg sume ade..and indeed kdg2 mmg rse nk slap je (mngkin ptt pki glove?hueh)
Walaupun (asal cm skema gile dah ni) ade manusia berperangai pelik and die pulak yg pelik dgn ktorg padahal die yg pelik..tp ada jgk manusia xpelik kt sini..and kalau dulu selalu je rasa best klau Allah buat iman tu diwarisi..bila kerja rasa Allah sangat adil sbb x buat iman tu diwarisi..kalau tak mmg kesian anak2 bos n staff sini^^ betul la manusia ni sgt mudah lupa kt Allah bila dah senang..
Tapi, one thing that i'm afraid of is ade saying ke ape tah ckp org yg baik xboleh ddk dlm lingkungan org belum baik sbb lmbt laun die akan terikut..and org blm baik kalau ddk dlm lingkungan org baik die akn berubah jd baik..sy bukan lah nk ckp: "weh..sy bai..korg tak!!"..nope..coz i know that i'm not..tp Allah byk sgt jg aib sy:'( what i'm trying to say is sy rindu usrah dan uia..sbb sy dikelilingi org2 yg baik n berusaha utk jd baik..selama ni 24jam dikelilingi mrk..skrg hampir separuh hari dikelilingi mrk yg seperti di ats..dan kdg2 sy rse sy da affected dgn suasana ni:'(
till then~
p/s: sila la doakn sy..sy xtahu nape hati sy pelik skrg..and ianya sgt menyedihkan..
p/ss: sy rndu amat sgt dkt kia kaha..mrk sangaaattt bg sy kekuatan utk ubah and stop byk bnde yg sy pttnye stop lame dah..*hugs*
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
emotional disorder?
You can ignore this post since I write this while having emotional breakdown
so, it might be serabut
but I just wanna share something that I've found useful for me
Currently I think I've lost interest in engineering
ha ha ha..shame on me
after almost 3 years suddenly it hit me this semester
and it is disaster
I've no passion at all to go to class, taking exams, quizzes, doing assignments and all other things student should do..
but then, I've quite enjoying the skill i'm taking which is sewing
it is like a thing that can ease the burden that i've felt for the whole week of engineering thinggy..
so, I was wondering how can I build the passion back since i still need to graduate etc..duh
and I found this article and I'm going to try it
so, in case you people have the same problem, I wish it will help :)
How to survive creative burnout
How to know when you’re burned out
- You dread getting up in the morning (unless this is not unusual for you)
- You don’t care anymore about something you were passionate about
- You saw the title of this essay and felt a ray of hope
- Inspired motivated creative people annoy you
- Everything seems gray and pointless
- You’re drinking more or eating more, or showing whatever your signs of depression are
- You find it hard to relax
- It seems impossible to do basic work you know you’re capable of
Survival tactics
- Plan an escape. Take a day off and do the most dramatically easy but fun thing you can think of. Go see a matinee downtown, have a fantastic lunch, shop, browse, and walk. Be as indulgent as you can stand, and drag as many of your friends along with you. (Offer to return the favor with them when they’re burnt out.). Use a vacation day, or a sick day (Isn’t burnout a form of poor mental health?)
- Laugh. Whatever it is you find funny, bring more of it into your life. Whether it’s certain people, films, tv shows, plays, books. Choose to laugh.
- Scream. I’m a believer in primal screams. I always feel better after I’ve yelled at the top of my lungs for no particular reason, doubly so if I’m pissed off about something. Practice different screams, such as yelling ordinary words (“Papaya!!!”) vs. generic scream sounds (“Aaaaaaaagggh!”). Get friends and co-workers to participate if you can. Even if alone, and you have to do it into a pillow or underwater to not upset the neighbors, do it anyway. You’ll feel better, I promise.
- Fun time: how much time per day do you do stuff purely for fun? Just because you like it and for no other reason? Why isn’t this number larger? What is more important than fun and happiness over the course of a lifetime?
- Sleep & Exercise. Unfortunately, our minds are connected to our bodies, and if we treat our bodies poorly, well, our minds kind of get pissed off. I’ve found that if I’m not getting enough exercise, I’m about half as useful to the world than otherwise. Start taking a walk every day. Go swimming. Have more/better sex. Free up your body, and your mind will follow.
- Travel: Get in the car, pick a direction, and drive. Grab friends, or not. Bring food, or not. Play music really loud, or just roll down the windows, and stick your head out (pssst.. this is a good time to scream). Use some vacation time, or ask for time without pay so you can stretch out your time (and your time may be more valuable than your money).
Beginning again
- Break things into smaller pieces. If you can’t design the whole website, or code the whole function, break it down. What are the smallest meaningful pieces to work with? Work on a page. Can’t do a page? Work on part of a page. Get down the smallest bit you feel you can manage, but do it. Like Guthrie said, take it easy, but take it. After you do one piece, find the strength to do the next one. If you can’t, go for a walk, call a friend, but then come back and try again. And on and on. One small piece at a time. If you’re lucky, once you’ve got a few pieces done, you’ll hit your stride and it won’t seem so bad. If not, just slug it out. At least you’ll be able to say tommorow you did something today.
- Look at the worst pieces of work you know of. The worst writing. The worst painting. The worst web design. Worst whatever. Do you feel anything when you look at the crap? Does it annoy you? Make you angry? Is there still a response there at all? Some energy somewhere in your gut? Can you redirect it?
- Repeat above, only with the best piece of work you know. Go to a museum, or your favorite building. Watch your favorite film, read your favorite book. Do you get any energy there? Anything you can bring with you into your own project?
Avoiding burn-out
- Change your work environment: What do you do at work when you feel stuck (not burnt out, but just stuck on a problem)? Are there things you can do to your cube or office to help you deal with those times? Posters of work that inspires you? Things that make you laugh? Music that helps you think through a problem? You spend 8 hours a day in that space: it’s worth taking a couple of hours to improve it by even 5 or 10%. If you suck at this and don’t know where to start (e.g. you’re male), ask a friend to help you out.
- Project assignments: How do you decide what project assignments to take? How can you find more variety in your work, so that there’s a chance you’ll develop new interests, or new skills? Real growth is the best burnout prevention technique. It’s easier to stay interested if the work and the people stay interesting.
- Work on more than one project at a time. My wife, an artist, never works on one painting at a time. When she feels stuck on one, she’ll move over to another and it always seems fresh and interesting, compared to the work she just left. I find the same thing with writing and designing. Find ways to give yourself alternatives, so that you can still be productive, while having the choice to temporarily skip a problem you are annoyed by or frustrated with.
- Managers and work relationships. Do you like the people you work with? I don’t know how long I could be creative if I fundamentally didn’t like or get along with my boss, or most of my co-workers. The real problem might not be creative at all. It might be the unhealthy nature of your work relationships. Time spent improving relationship skills creates the potential for change, while banging your head against the wall every day and complaining to friends probably doesn’t.
- Career & Lifestyle: How long have you been doing what you’re doing? Do you expect to do it forever? Perhaps you need bigger changes in your life that you’re getting. A new friend, a new lover, a new city, a new company, a new hobby, might be the only way to move your life forward.
Know Thyself
Friday, April 20, 2012
Mati yang Pasti
Mati.
it is a simple word yet many people are afraid of it.
sedar tak sedar, umat sekarang ramai yang ditimpa penyakit wahn which is takut mati & cintakan dunia (moga kita dijauhkan la..tsk)
Ummi once said: "ummi bukan takut mati tu, tapi nnt ddk dlm kubur tu sorg2..teman kita amalan kita je".
It is true indeed..sangattt..It is ouch kat hati bila dengar (angah tau ummi baca blog angah..perasan..haha)
Kita selalu je tangguh buat ibadah & benda baik lain
Padahal Allah dah pesan dah "bersegeralah kamu ke arah kebaikan"
sebab syaitan tu selalu je nak lengahkan kita
And kita ni macam yakin sangat lagi satu saat yg kita tangguh tu kita hidup lagi
Tapi still kita nakkkkk jugak utamakan benda lain tu
manusia sangat~
So, anda yang baca ni..amal dah cukup untuk mati yg bila2 akan datang?
The fact is berapa banyak pun amal kita buat, it is impossible untuk membolehkan kita masuk syurga. Nak masuk syurga kena bergantung kepada Allah's mercy.
Jadi, selama kita hidup..apa yang kita dah buat utk dapatkan rahmat dr Allah tu?
Kalau kita rasa dgn buat solat 5 waktu yang kadang2 lompong, puasa ramadahan yg tak cukup sebulan, baca yassin sbb culture, tutup aurat yang kadang2 tak berapa nak tutup dan lain2 amalan utk diri kita dah cukup..it is NOT ENOUGH!
kita baru tunaikan tanggungjawab sebagai hamba Allah..tapi tanggungjawab sebagai khalifah kita buat tak?
Kita selalu lupa Allah ciptakan kita ada dua sebab; untuk beribadah and untuk jadi khalifah kt muka bumi.
Nak jadi hamba Allah yang baik memang kita kena usaha sendiri. Tapi nak jadi khalifah Allah tu, nak meriahkan bumi Allah ni dengan Islam. Tapi penat la kalau nak buat sorang2. Sebab tu Allah suruh kita berkenalan, ta'aruf, have a good family, be with good people, bekerja sungguh2 untuk tegakkan Islam atas muka bumi. Sebab, benda2 tu yang akan bantu kita fulfill tugas kita as khalifah. Jadi jom pegi usrah >.< Sekurang-kurangnya, bila kena hisab, kalau Allah tanya masa muda, masa free kita apa yang kita buat? tak la terkedu sangat. Takkan la masa tu nak cakap "err..tengok movie?", "tengok oppa?", "tidur?(ouch)"..peh..malu gila nak cakap kat Allah macam tu..kannn?
let's sit and think a while..jangan nak jadi manusia yang sombong..Takkan dengan Allah pun kita nak sombong..over la tuu..
Tentang Hati
Monday, April 9, 2012
Refleksi Diri
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
losing an engineer
bismillah
i was doing my jual beli works with Allah suddenly i got a sad news
my friend's father had passed away..zohor
and i knew it bila dah asar (apekah kann)
i was glad though sbb sempat ziarah ahad lepas
last sunday jumpa dia mcm ok
she told me her father is getting better compared to just after going out of hospital
tapi tu lah
nyawa tu Allah memang dah tentukan bila tarikh luput
i should contact her but then i don't..YET
she doesn't have malaysia number since she's studying at india
i have her home number though
tapi tak tahu how to react, what should i say etc kalau call
but i know she is strong
and wayy stronger than me
she was like my twin
even our parents call us that since we have quite similar face (tp tinggi xsame >.<)
and i am enjoying going to her house
sbb bila my friend is at india
rasa mcm at least dpt la kurgkn rndu mak die kt dia
mcm kelakar kan
tp honestly, that is what i feel
enough of ranting
semoga arwah ditempatkan dikalangan orang soleh
he was a great pakcik and engineer :)
Thursday, January 26, 2012
YOQ 12'
salam..
it has been a week after YOQ ended..
yet the memory is still there..will always be there in heart n mind..
a great memory indeed..
it started when i received a proposal msg that asked whether it is possible if i become a committee for the prog..and i was like..ok..sgt xromantik proposal msg ni..hueh..but yes i agree..
as AJK pengalaman tu sgt berbeza sbnrnye..and sbnrnye bile tahu ade YOQ i was like..yeah!nk jd pserta..sbb YOQ sangaaaatttt best biasanye..and it is one of prog yg sgt ditunggu..
bile jd committee..ade byk jgk bnde rse rugi..tp dpt jmpe adk2 n akk2 yg xpernah jmpe dpt tmpung n hlangkn sdkit sbyk rse rugi tu..
SEBAB..mrk sgt hebat n inspiring..
bile tgk gmbr n video xplorace rse sgt jeles sbb xdpt tgk semua checkpoint:'(
bile tgk mlm kebudayaan rse sgt WAU..hbt ah drg ni..mse xbyk..pastu sbuk buat aktvti lain..tp prsmbhn drg sgt mnyntuh hati n sumenye best!
the last slot which is hati ke hati adlh satu slot yg sgt xdisukai sbnrnye..hu..bkn sbb xbest..nope!tp sbb tahu msti akn nangis which is part yg sgt xske..sbb bile start ni susah nk brhnti..n i've always fought the urge utk ngs bcoz of that reason..tp at that moment sbnrnye.rse nk jmpe seseorg n ckp.."kte sgt bangga dgn awk..wlupun kte bwk usrah awk kjp je..tp bile tgk ur prsmbhn smlm..honestly rse nk ngs sbb sgt happy for u:)" but..yeah..i've no guts..haha..cm ape je kn..
bile bce 2 simple question yg drg kne jwb lagiiiii rse trsntuh..and there are some answers yg buat rse cm nk ngs bile bce..btul la..hidayah Allah tu dtg dlm byk cara yg kdg2 kte xjangka pn..
but above all..being an AJK mmg sgt penat wlupun mcm xbuat keje..and ramaaiii akhwat lain yg tlg buat keje smpi kne tego mood swing..tak2..tu bkn mood swing sbnrnye..tp bile rse mcm sndri xbuat keje and bile someone mention rse kredibiliti trgugat..mcm ape kannn..bkn nk ckp trime kasih sbb bntu sy ke ape..bad..
and somehow mmg sgt2 berharap xde spe yg sakit sbb this was the 1st time jd keselamatn & kebersihan so i was like xtahu nk wtpe sgt bile ade yg injured dll-_-' (tapi start 2nd day ramaaaiiii sakit^^ and ia sgt menguji snanye)
and i learn to become sabar..bile sblm sbuh org kjut2 mtk 1st aid..kua khemah jln mcm org mbuk..mmg sgt nk kne sabar..dgn diri xterurus nk pg mnguruskn org lain>.<
long enuff i guess..smg kite semua sama2 tetap atas jalan ni!!
p/s:mtk maaf klau ade kebajikan yg xterjaga n terkurang
